A mom in my playgroup recently asked for some advice about getting her children to sleep.  This seems to be a problem for many families because there are a lot of books on the subject and I hear this same concern from other parents.

I am thankful to say that I have been pretty successful in getting my children to sleep.  I have worked out a specific routine and methods based on things I’ve learned.  Some of it comes from various articles I’ve read and some of it comes from a sleep expert that I interviewed for a television show… so these methods can also work for adults.  Here’s my philosophy and here’s what I do…

Routine is very important for kids, so in our house we stick close to the same routine every night.  The whole evening revolves around “winding down”.  Children are such physical beings, naturally with so much energy in their bodies, they need to transition the energy from their bodies into their head to get sleepy.

• Around dusk, if we turn on the lights, we keep them dim.  Bright lights will affect a child’s mood and can amp them up.

• Close to bedtime, I have my child put all toys away.  I don’t allow him to play with toys because it winds him up physically.  If we do anything fun, it would be reading a book so he can get begin to focus more energy into thinking, rather than being physical.

• Bath time is important because elevating the body’s temperature helps a person sleep better at night.  Keeping the bedroom temperature cool (around 65-70 degrees) helps the body to feel warmer than the outside temperature which helps induce sleep.

• Keep the bedroom free of clutter.  We put bedside books away in a basket.  Only blankets, pillows and stuffed animals stay on the bed.  And no electronics by the bed either.

• Sometimes I spray lavender essential oil on the pillows.  The lavender scent helps to calm and relax.

• We used to light a candle and read by candle light.  The flickering candlelight is symbolic of the sun going down and subconsciously sends a message that it is time to go to sleep.   When my son was ready to go to sleep I would let him blow out the candle.  (My husband would let him hold the candle and blow it out when he was just over a year old.  This gave him great respect for being careful with fire.)

• Instead of the candle, now we do more talking to process what happened during the day.  This talking helps him to get even more into his head preparing him for sleep.

• Once we are lying down, I start with the same words every night, “We had a nice, fun day!”  “What did we do today?”  Now before I say it, he will say, “What did we do today?”  Then he will continue talking about what we did that day.  This helps him to search his memory banks, inducing sleep even more.

• If he had a particular problem that day, I will ask him if he wants to hear a story.  He always replies, “Yes!”.  Then I make up a story about Earl the squirrel or Molly the mouse and have them encounter the same problem he ran into that day.  Earl or Molly will be able to model the behavior that I want my child to have and amazingly this really does work!  And of course at the end of the story, Earl the squirrel or Molly the mouse is happy, safe and sound with his mommy or his mommy and daddy.  Also, all of his friends, his mommy and his daddy are happy too.

• We do deep breathing together to let out any extra energy stuck in his body.  Deep breathing also brings more oxygen into the body relaxing him even more.  (One time I woke up in the middle of the night to hear him deep breathing himself back to sleep.)

• The final thing to lull him to sleep is counting.  (I give my husband the credit because he started this counting sheep, as well as the deep breathing)  Now we count whatever my son wants.  I make sure he can visualize it in his mind as we are counting.  Sometimes it’s trains going by.  Other times it’s doggies walking by.  (His first “joke” was that he wanted to count “Goats eating a banana!  It’s funny!”, he said and then he laughed for a long time.)  Counting always puts him to sleep if we make sure to do all the other things in “winding down” process through the evening.

It really is that simple.  Set a routine and stick to a regular bed time.  Then you and your spouse will be able to enjoy a few hours of time to yourselves before you turn in for the night.

Good luck and sweet dreams,

Your Sensible Girlfriend